Friday, April 01, 2005
History lesson #2 (part one)
History Lesson #2
(unhappy memories)

So here it is, my childhood. Oh the excitement consumes me as I reflect.
That was sarcasm. Did you pick it up?
Let's see. I was born in Dallas, Texas on May 15th 1980... A little too far back for ya? Ok, skip forward exactly four years and four days to May 19th 1984. Four days after my fourth birthday. This is the day of my first childhood memory. My grandfather was taking me and my brother to my uncle's house for a post birthday sleepover. I remember that I was excited, I also remember that I was in my pajamas and that my grandfather was carrying my (then almost two year old) brother. We lived in an apartment complex and it was dark. I was holding his had as we walked through the parking lot and he let go when he got the keys out to unlock the door. I was looking at the other cars when he fell down. He fell onto his back, his head hit the speed bump that is in front of a parked car. My brother immediately started wailing. I remember that I didn't know what to do. I couldn't remember how to get to the apartment and I was afraid to walk very far away because my brother was there. A man walked up and asked if I needed help. I told him that I did. I can't remember whether I was crying or not.
Flash forward thirty minutes. I don't remember what happened in between, but the next thing I do remember is sitting backwards on the couch on my knees. I had the curtain pulled back and I was looking out the window. I had the sheer curtain pulled aside andI could see the ambulance outside with the lights flashing. There were people, but I had no idea who they were or what was going on. My grandfather was dead, he had a heart attack. I felt guilty for a long time like I should have done something, gotten help sooner. I remember that we couldn't attend the funeral. I also remember that no one talked to me. No one explained to me what had happened and no one checked to see if I was upset about the death of the man who gave me horsy rides on his knee and bought me a bunny for Easter because I decided at the last minute that I wanted one.
Flash forward to Christmas. My brother and I are with my father. We wakeup on Christmas morning very early. It was still dark outside, but we are both so excited because we want to see what Santa has brought us. We makeup our beds first because our dad would have been mad if we didn't. Then we sneak into the living room, but there isn't anything there. I looked at the clock and it was definitely morning. We go wake my dad up and tell him thatthere are no presents, where is Santa? He tells us to go back to bed. He says that there isn't any Santa Claus, it's just your parents and that hewill be up later and he will get all of the presents out then.

continued...

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so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 7:20 AM
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Who: katehopeeden
Where: San Antonio, Texas Yeah, so I am all that you see here. I am friendly and kind, crazy and bitchy, playful and flirty... sometimes I am funny but mostly I just write the first thing that comes to mind and then stop when it ends. I love life and I am lucky to be living the one that I am. Want to know more?
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12/14/84 - 1/26/05


"The most wasted day is one in which we have not laughed"

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