Tuesday, November 29, 2005
post call commentary
I almost chickened out people.
No, seriously.
First of all, I came home and C-L-E-A-N-E-D. Being out of commission for four days and finally feeling half way normal again made me realize what a sty I was existing in. I completely cleaned my kitchen.
Ahhhh, to be barefoot again :)
So, since I was binge cleaning, the fact that I was going to be putting myself up for Rejection [dun dun duuuun] slipped my mind temporarily. It was awesome. But then, seven thirty rolled around and as I was preparing the girls for the big fight known as Bedtime, the little light bulb popped on over my head and the butterflies showed up.
Ok, how cool it is to have butterflies? I mean, cooler if you know that when you call a guy it will be cool that you are calling and not straight up piss him off... but you take what you can get right? Well, that's what I was telling myself all day anyway. I was all Kate, this is awesome. You have butterflies. You are nervous. It rocks that you are nervous. Even if he is all like "please - just lose my number will ya?" it's cool because you have butterflies. That last part was not so much on the convincing side, but oh well.
So, I put the girls in bed a little late at eight thirty and then head into the living room to watch crap on TV until they pass out. If you have children, you know why. If you don't then I'll let you in on a little secret. They will so think of exactly 4.2 million reasons to get up and ask for various things or come clean with some insane illness that they have picked up and it is a well known fact that children must pee and drink water 2.9 million times before they can actually go to sleep. I don't know why.

It's science.
So, considering that I know about the kid thing, I try and wait for the girls to go to sleep before making any phone calls that I don't want interrupted.
And all was good. Until they were asleep. Oh yeah, all of that confidence I had before when I was talking to Toddy or Jiffinner or TCL was suddenly hard to locate. Seems that you are reeaaal brave until it's time to actually make the call.
Stay with me here. I had played what I was going to say in my head over and over and over since Saturday night. That is forty eight hours, dear readers.

Forty. Eight.
That is so plenty of time to prepare and memorize. Yet, as I am sitting on my bed, with my door shut, hoping Ruthie can't hear me and then later make fun of me, holding my cell phone with my finger hovering over the call button, I am blank.
Blank.
I mean, I remembered why I was going to call. I remembered his name and mine. But that was pretty much it. I knew I should have typed it up at work today. Then, I would have had a reference. Plus, there are suddenly things coming to mind that I wasn't scared of before. Like, after I ask him and he either says 'yes', 'no', or 'maybe', what do I say then? Am I supposed to just get off the phone or make conversation? Should I give myself a ten minute limit and then make up a reason that I have to go so that I don't let on as to what a complete ass I can actually be when I am nervous?
So, I did what I always do. I said fuck it and hit call and held my breath.
One ring...
Two rings...
Three rings...
Four rings....
Now, at four rings, I am thinking I am about to get his voice mail and I am trying, very very hard to put together a message in my head that doesn't sound absolutely asinine and at the same time debating whether I should leave a message. Because if I leave a message then the ball is in his court and lets be frank here, I like to have the ball.
"Hello?"
And it's game time.
I will spare you the stuttering idiocy of the play by play here. Let's just say, articulate - I was not. After I made sure I wasn't calling too late, I did the whole I got your number from TCL, I hope that's alright thing and he said it was. But didn't just say it was, he was all like I'm glad you called. That gave me the little confidence boost I needed to stumble over inviting him out. So, I spit the invitation out as quickly and as pathetically as possible. I gave him the date and time and then waited.
It's that waiting part.

Yeah, it's like five seconds, but it feels like forever.
And do you know what he said people? He said he'd "love to"...

Oh yeah.
Said he needed to check the whole work schedule thing, but if he was clean then yes. So, I am like silently doing the happy dance (you remember the one Jiffinner? lol) and at the same time trying to think of something to say next... but, I didn't have to. Because he started talking. Asking me how I was, what was new. He was keeping me on the phone. And he did, for an hour. And at eleven fifteen, he said he should let me go since we both have to work in the morning but he would check to see if he was clear to go. I told him he had my number now since it was on his caller id and to feel free to call me (bye bye ball). Then he said he really enjoyed talking to me and then did one of my all time favorite things. Before he said "goodbye" he said "good night." I don't know why I dig that, but I do.
So, I tentatively have a date. Yay!
And now, I am so going to bed!
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 12:18 AM
| link to this post | 10 spoke |

Monday, November 28, 2005
so, I met a guy....
Ok, so it isn't like I just met him. I have met him before.... In fact, I think that The Cake Lady has been trying to set me up with him since Trin was born. (we are calling him "Snakeman") I guess the timing was consistently off though. In the last 3+ years, I have bumped into him at her house probably a half a dozen times and was probably only single and looking once.
Anyway, she had mentioned that he would be in town this whole past week for Thanksgiving (he lives in Austin) and that I should stop by. Needless to say, with my evil death sickness, flirting was just a little low on my "to do list" but when I talked to TCL on Saturday she said I should come by... actually she said "slap on some bondo and get your ass over here." Bet you didn't think she talked like that huh? What with her being all sweet and shit, lol. So, I said I would get Amanda and Emilee dressed and we'd come over and roast marshmallows. (Trin was already asleep, it was like 7ish.) Me: jeans, huge gray long sleeved shirt and my hair washed and down, but not with crap in it and zero makeup.
When I got there, TCL was at the store so her husband and I were sitting around chatting when Snakeman showed up. He sat down on the couch by me and joked with me and with Amanda who was sitting by me.
Ok, so I wrote this VERY long version of this and I think it might be just a little TOO long, lol. But, long story short, he and I stood outside and talked for a couple of hours and he was nice and funny. [Get ready guys, you are about to see, firsthand, how chics overanalyze every little tiny thing that you do.] There are these little riddle things on the underside of the bottle caps from some of the beer that they had there and whenever he got a new one he would stand like right next to me and hold it for both of us so we could figure it out. When he handed me something, he touched my hand pretty much every time. He kept great eye contact. When we were inside, he helped me when I was putting some things up for TCL. He hung out in the kitchen with she and I instead of eating in the living room with TCL's husband. Oh and he has two fucking huge dogs and when we were talking inside he said something to the effect that it would be interesting to see if his dogs liked me. When we were outside, he brought them over, one at a time and they both did. Which was relieving to me since I value my fingers, you know? He said he was surprised that the latter of the two liked me since he apparently doesn't like many people. Yeah, I thought it sounded like a line too :P
He asked me a lot of questions about the girls. Did the thing that everyone does where they can't believe how much Amanda looks like me but Emilee doesn't look a thing like me. And speaking of Amanda, at one point, I would have liked to have KILLED her. She was standing there munching on gooey marshmallow while he and I were talking and it was like a light bulb went off in her head. He walked over to the fire and Amanda looks at TCL's oldest and whispers "Is he married?" She shakes her head "no" and Amanda looks at me, completely not seeing the 'Shut up right this second or I will kill you' look in my eye, and she whispers "I like him Mommy."
Let's see... what else? He is thirty four, never married, no kids, great green eyes. He clearly envies what TCL and her husband have (and who doesn't? They are the epitome of happily married) and even said something about how he had left and moved to San Antonio and then Austin and hadn't found anything but that TCL's husband had stayed put and everything had come to him.
Anyway, when we left, I hadn't gotten his number or anything. I'm sure I missed a couple of obvious "ins" but hey, I had just came out of the coma like that morning ok?? What made it worse was that when I was walking out to the car with the girls, he was walking with us and he was saying all of the "I had a nice time talking to you" and "it was great seeing you again" stuff and I couldn't do anything because the girls were right there. And by the time I had put them in the car, I think he figured he had dropped enough hints. The entire drive home the girls are basically telling me to go by a dress and his and hers towels without my having given anything away to them.
Well, last night, TCL gave me his number and I am going to call him tonight and ask him out. Oh yeah, I am sporting some balls ;) So, wish me luck!
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 6:39 AM
| link to this post | 5 spoke |

Sunday, November 27, 2005
"It's ALIVE!!!"
...you know? Like from the movie? With the guy who is made from like seven different guys?

Ok, fine, I will refrain from other obscure references. Anyway, so feeling better! Yay! As in, I can swallow again. er-- wait, let me rephrase...
Wondering exactly how sick I was? Oh, please, let me tell you. I wasn't like all cough-cough I think I will call into work sick, nor was I oh, I think I ate something bad at the restaurant last night sick. I was couldn't get out of bed, taught my kids some fucked up version of sign language because I couldn't talk and needed liquids, forgot what day it was, prayed for death, drank two bottles of NyQuil, wouldn't take phone calls unless it was the Pope calling to read me my last rites, in so much pain that I didn't care about watching L&O, didn't cook Thanksgiving dinner because I am fucked up enough to think that the Turkey has feelings too, called my mother and asked for help after two days of a fever over 102.5, HUGGED my mother when she got here, wondered if I should call the Center For Disease Control to keep it contained kind of sick.
Oh yeah. "Hell" was an understatement. When I left for work Wednesday morning, I was kind of "eechh" but thought it was a sinus thing. So, I popped an Aleve Cold & Sinus (which is the shit, second only to the almighty NyQuil) and waited for it to kick the funk outta my head. Much to my surprise (and chagrin), it did no such thing. The further into the day I got, the funkier (take that spell checker!) I felt. Finally, I bailed from work a little after lunch time and grabbed some pizzas from Little Caesars and went to get the girls. We got home in between two and three and after hooking them up with some pizza and plopping them in front of the TV in their room, I checked on Ruthie. She was praying for death in the living room. I offered her a number of things, all of which she grunted her refusal. If only I had known that I was only a day behind her.
After changing out of my work clothes, I crashed in Amanda's bed until almost seven. When I woke up, I knew I was f-u-c-k-e-d. I got the girls to bed and took a massive dose of NyQuil and went to sleep. That is really the last thing I can remember that isn't under a haze of medication and evil sickness pain. There is a blur of NyQuil and thermometers and children and phone calls and the mess that can only be made by three kids that are only semi-supervised by two sick guardians.
The Cake Lady saved Thanksgiving by cooking my turkey and bringing it and mashed potatoes (which Amanda said were "the best ever"), gravy and stuffing over. She wins the whole Friend Of The Year Award. My mother came on Friday and saved my sanity. She made soup for Ruthie and I while we moaned and cried in are respective rooms. I hugged her when she got here. Hugged. Her.
When I was putting the girls to bed last night (and by that I mean, when I came in to say good night after my mom did all the work while I was laying in bed), Emilee asked me if I was feeling better. I told her yeah and she said "good, then it worked"... I asked her what she meant and she said "I wished on my wishbone that you would get better and now you are, so it worked." She used her wishbone wish on me! Too sweet.
So, I think I have met my "sick quota" for the remainder of the year. Thank you guys so much for the emails :)
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 12:09 AM
| link to this post | 3 spoke |

Friday, November 25, 2005
Thanksgiving
You know that part of Thanksgiving where you sit down at the table and hold hands and everyone announces the things that they are Thankful for?
You don't?
Oh...
So, it does only happen on TV?
No wonder the guests always look at me funny...

Moving on...

This year, I am not going out of town like I did last year... and the year before... and the year before. This year, I am staying home. I am going to suck every second out of my four day weekend by sitting on my couch watching reruns of Law & Order (bah - you say reruns but they are new to me!) and finish crocheting my daughter's scarf. At some point in time, I will cook the Thanksgiving basics: Turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing... lots of stuffing, sweet potatoes, rolls, gravy and pie.

What?? No green bean casserole? That's right. One of the more stellar things about being the Mom (aka: Head Of Household according to the IRS) is not having to eat green bean casserole. No green beans, no gross disgusting yucky cream of mushroom soup, no french fried onions. None. And there is no one here to stop me.. or start me, depending on how you look at that.
Anyway, four days. Do you know what I could do with four days? I ask because what I could do and what I will do are probably going to be very different.
I could clean my entire house from top to bottom, reorganizing everything as I go. Although, I will probably clean my room and once over everything else so as not to cut into my L&O time. I could go visit all of the people that I have been neglecting over the last few weeks... ok, ok, MONTHS... but, I will probably just hang out with Fairy on T-day and then pop over to The Cake Lady's house over the weekend. (Fine, so what if I have ulterior motives for going to TCL's house? She.Makes.Fudge. Like, makes it. As in, not buying it. Oh yeah, and her husband has some single male company. And, if you have been keeping track, today is the eighty eighth day I haven't been laid. No, you read that right eighty-eighth. As in, less than two weeks until I hit the 100-day-mark. Lets add that up, for shits and giggles. December sixth. Fucking wonderful.)
Ok, so now that we have covered exactly how much screwing around uh... fucking off sitting on my ass I plan on doing this weekend, lets get to the important stuff.
Things I am thankful for:
~First and foremost my girls... always my girls. Every morning when I wake them up for school, I just look at them and am in awe. It's like when you get some really cool present and you have to keep pinching yourself because you can't believe it is true. That's what it is like to be a mom for me. Everyday, I can't believe they are mine.
~My health. Having been health-issue-free (*knock on wood*) for the better part of three years now has not went unnoticed by me. When I was sick, I remembered thinking how happy it would make me if I could just get up and make all of the beds, I haven't forgotten how much I missed that.
~My car. Yes, she's old. Yes, she is a little beat up. And bless her heart, I leave a mess inside of her... but every morning when she starts, I thank her. When I first bought my car, I thought I would drive it for six months, maybe a year and then I would get another one. A newer one, a more reliable car that got MUCH better gas mileage. Here it is now, two full years later and she still starts every morning. When you are a single mom, that means the world to you.
~My friends. I have some of the best friends any girl could ever ask for. My real life friends and my online friends are top notch. If I had played the friend lotto, I would have won the jackpot. When I lived with NY in San Antonio, I remember feeling like I didn't have any friends because the few that I did have were far from me. I had a couple of people online and then a couple of people that I could use up all my long distance chatting with. Since I have moved out of the city, I have made and resumed some wonderful friendships.
~My job. For all of the griping I could do about my job, I really do like it. I work with (mostly) good people. I like and am good at what I do. The pay isn't wonderful, but for the last two and a half years, it has kept me and the girls taken care of. And, I have time to blog :P
~My experiences. Every year new things happen in my life that continue to help mold me. This year was no exception. There have been the big things and then some that were seemingly insignificant. All of them were important in their own way.
~My family. It's funny how easy it is to bitch about your family, but for all of the bitching and moaning I do about them, I am glad that they are here. Not just for me, but for the girls as well. Having my parents and my brother and sisters love my kids means the world to me.

(I wrote this on Wednesday and had planned on posting it on Thursday. However, I came down with some kind of evil nasty death sickness that put me in bed Wednesday and kept me there until about ten minutes ago. I am wicked sick. Like so sick, I can't even talk because my throat is like swollen almost shut :( Anyway, I hope every one had a lovely Thanksgiving!!! And go over to The Cake Lady's blog and tell her how FUCKING AWESOME she is for making our dinner for us! I owe you - BIG TIME!)
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 2:24 AM
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Thursday, November 24, 2005
HNT: The screwed, blued and... edition
Ok, so while my sister was off tanning and playing on the beautiful beaches of Hawaii, she got inked. The day before her flight home, she got this lovely tattoo on her back. Now, I know, I haven't posted any pics of me for a couple of weeks now, but I couldn't help it. When I saw her new tattoo, I immediately thought that is soooo gonna be the HNT picture this week!! So much for strange Thanksgiving day HNT pics :P


Ruthie's tattoo


HNTbutton

so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 12:00 AM
| link to this post | 14 spoke |

Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Am I the only one who wants their keyboard to have all lower case letters so I can match them up with the Word Verification?
I saw my first 3D movie last night. Yeah, yeah, I know... How does one get to be this far into life without ever having seen a 3D movie? I have no fucking idea. Anyway, we went and saw Chicken Little. I so totally moved out of the way of the ball that they threw and felt like an ass when the guy next to me laughed :P
I have this problem when it comes to watching movies in the theater. I laugh longer than regular people. Like, Abby Mallard is Chicken Little's best friend... so through out the whole movie she keeps telling him he needs to talk to his dad. She brings all of the duck magazines with her and shows him all of these articles about how he needs to have a long talk with his dad so they can have closure. One of her magazines says that carrying around all of that baggage can lead to molting. So, the one really funny part in the movie where Chicken Little is freaking out on his dad. He is talking really fast, trying to clear up all of their issues while the aliens are attacking outside. And he ends his very fast and long speech with: "They say that having no closure can lead to molting, and… and I'm already small enough as it is and I don't think I can handle being bald!"
That just plain cracked my shit up. I laughed really loudly. Enough so, that I noticed it was louder than everyone else had laughed. So, I stopped. But, then I couldn't. I had this horrible little giggle fit. So, I am missing like five minutes of the movie because I can't stop laughing and I am trying to do it quietly. Yeah, issues. I know. Anyway, I am just glad that the girls aren't old enough to be embarrassed yet :)
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 6:35 AM
| link to this post | 7 spoke |

Monday, November 21, 2005
-cell phone rings-
Me: Hello?
Noah: Hey, it's Noah.
Me: Hey, what's up?
Noah: I was wondering if you guys had plans for Spring Break?
Me: Nope. Why?

Noah: Well, I was thinking that it would be fun to bring Amanda and Emilee out here before I leave.
Me: Amanda and Emilee?

Noah: Well, Trin too... I just don't know if Ruthie would want to fly out here with all three girls by herself...
Me: Ruthie?

Noah: Yeah. I figured Ruthie and Amanda and Emilee could fly out for a week, hang out on the beach... you know? Before I leave?
Me: Ok, so let me get this straight. You want to fly Amanda, Emilee and RUTHIE out to Hawaii for Spring Break?

Noah: Yeah. I mean, Ruthie knows her way around so she would be ok with the girls.
Me: Uh, hello! What about your other sister? Me. You don't think maybe I would like to go to Hawaii for Spring Break????
Noah: [laughing] Oh, no, you have to work. That's what moms do. They stay home and work while everyone goes to Hawaii.
Me: Noah! Ruthie was just. there. And she is moving back like four months after Spring Break. She. Was. Just. There. Like, just there. She was there for like five months. Five. If you are going to fly my girls out to Hawaii for Spring Break, don't cha think you should fly their mom, your sister, out with them?

Noah: Oh, Kate, hold on a sec... I need to turn the valve on the side of my head on...
Me: What the fuck are you talking about?
Noah: You know, the valve by my ear... so all of this goes in one ear and out the other.
Me: Fuck off.
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 6:25 AM
| link to this post | 7 spoke |

Saturday, November 19, 2005
Dear Amanda,
At exactly 8:20am, November 19th, 1996, you changed my life. You made your way into the life of a sixteen year old girl and turned her into your mother.
I had no idea what I was getting myself into when I found out I was pregnant with you. I often joke that I thought I was getting a puppy, that I thought having a child meant little more than feeding someone and keeping them clean. I had no idea.




That's a first place there baby!

As with most first time mothers, my labor was long - very long. Like, I went into the hospital with contractions on the seventeenth and you weren't born for two whole days. Yeah, like that kind of long.

no more Mommy!

This was to be the first glimpse of that stubborn look you get in your eye that says you aren't budging. When you look at me with that challenge in your eyes just daring me to make you. You have such strong resolve and such a solid stance. When you've made up your mind about something, you stand by it with your all. There are times when, despite rhyme or reason, I just have to actually make you do something that sounds so ridiculous to you and you just hate it. You hate it when you've logically thought something out and it makes perfect sense to you and I am telling you that sense can be damned because you just have to go to sleep already and you just shatter inside. I can see straight through your eyes and that waiver of your control just switches on the tears.
You get this from me. This connection between frustration and tears. The inability to understand why something that makes so much sense to you just doesn't make sense to someone else. And when you've lost, when you haven't gotten your way even though it makes all the sense in the world that you should have, you just have to cry. I do this too, Amanda. Probably a lot more than you've ever seen, but I do it too.


Amanda reading

You have such an innate ability to adapt. I see it in you every day, I have since you were very little but it has shown so much more since you've started school. Your first day of school scared the ever loving shit out of me. I watched you put on a back pack and walk into a classroom full of people you didn't even know and sit at a desk you had never seen before and just brace yourself for whatever the day was going to throw at you. It broke my heart to let you go, to surrender my baby to a world that was out of my control. I waited for you to beg me to pull you out and reassure me that you still needed me, but you just smiled and waved.


My Third Grader

Weeks later, you had your first run in with acceptance. You came to me with your first ever problem in school. I remember you asking me if you could start taking your lunch with you to school. I think I told you that you would have to wait until the next week since you needed a lunch box and I needed to buy stuff to put in it. You just burst into tears. After you had calmed down, you explained that you needed to take your lunch because the kids who bring their lunch to school get to sit down first and you hated the feeling of walking into the cafeteria with your tray and not knowing who to sit with. I died inside when I found out that you had stood there with that tray and felt alone. That's the hardest thing about being a Mom. Knowing that you have to face those types of things by yourself and that I can't help you. We went and bought your lunchbox and you took your lunch that whole year. But you know what? The next year, you didn't want to anymore. You had made friends and you knew where to sit and who with.

Amanda


You have since managed to control your life at school in a way that makes me so proud. You have learned something that so few girls manage to learn until they are grown up and even then sometimes they don't. You have managed to be your own person and be popular without giving into what everyone else says you have to be. You are secure in the person you are. That alone amazes me.
When you ran for student council last year without asking me for anything more than my permission, I was shocked. And when you won, I was impressed. Impressed that you had been brave enough to give a speech in front of your entire grade, impressed that you were convincing enough during said speech to get their vote and impressed that every one likes you.




burning off some candy

I love that you remember things. You remember where you need to be or what you need to bring. I think you are sucking this out of me :P The more together you become, the more things I forget! You told me a couple of months ago, after my third trip back into the house for something, that I needed a list by the front door of all the things I needed to take with me when I left so I could remember them all. I actually thought about hanging a chalk board there.
Last night, you told me you couldn't wait to be ten, to be into double digits. And that with twelve you would finally be a pre-teen and then with thirteen you would be a teenager and then with fourteen, "a professional teenager."

Silly Face

I looked at you this morning when you came and hugged me before I left for work and I don't see this little girl any more. I see this person. This person who is deciding who she is going to be. This child who is up to my shoulders and who looks me in the eye when she talks to me. This person who is smart and brave and sometimes bossy :) I see a great big sister who loves and defends her little sisters, even from me.

my girls




You have such a big heart and if you still want to be a veterinarian when you are older, I think you would make such a good one because you just have so much love inside of you that wants to come out.

I braced myself over the last few years while waiting for the Teenager gene to come out and bite me, and everytime you get a little older, I wait for it... I am glad it isn't here yet because I am not ready to part with the Amanda that comes up to me and hugs me for no reason.
My favorite of our conversations right now goes just like this:
"Mommy, I love you."
"I love you too."
"I love you more."
I love that you still come and tell me you love me just because you do.

Amanda's 2005 school picture


We are at the halfway point right now. You are halfway to being a grown up. To being able to vote and leave home and make your own decisions with out asking anyone for permission and that scares me. The fact that the first nine years of your life have flown by so fast, as I am sure the next nine will, is so scary. But you are an awesome daughter. You are so cool and so sweet. And I loved every minute of the first nine years.

Amanda


Thank you so much for changing my life, for coming into mine and letting me be your mom. Thank you for sharing your life with me and being such a huge part of mine.
~Mom





so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 8:20 PM
| link to this post | 16 spoke |

Thursday, November 17, 2005
HNT - the boyfriend edition

Ok, let me just say that you guys ROCK. I got more emails yesterday than I have ever gotten before. Why? Well, apparently the fact that I screamed "DIBBS" from the mountain tops actually worked and all of you wanted to tell me that my obsession future husband had made the cover of People as the most Beautiful Man for 2005.
The funny thing is that my mother called me at 6:00 in the morning and was officially the first to inform me that he had won the cover... I would have went over and congratulated him in person but there is the issue of the restraining order and something about stalking... Surely just a misunderstanding..
-ahem- Anyway... So, as much as I am sure you are all just DYING to see more of my flesh, I will forgo half nekkid pics of myself and instead post a couple in his honor. Maybe next time, they will be HNT's of he and I together?
:P
mm01
Matthew
God Damn.
Matthew
mm07
mm12

Not enough for you? Don't worry, I have more.
Just click here :)
Happy HNT!



HNTbutton

so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 12:00 AM
| link to this post | 37 spoke |

Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Acrophobic Humpday: SCOREBOARD
ACRO

SCORE BOARD:

GREND31: 685
CHERISH: 75
KARI: 75
KARAMIA: 250
RHSP: 40
JIMC: 135
TUXBABY: 205
THE CAKE LADY: 135
CRAZYSILVER: 60
LOLA: 90
THE GIRL: 75
MADIGAN: 50
YODA: 40
BROWSER58: 20
DEVILGYRL: 30
DAISYDUKE: 10
MOOCOW: 10
CHICKEN: 30
ROBIN: 60

(I'll be dolling this up some later!)

so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 8:26 PM
| link to this post | 0 spoke |

Let's play a game :)
So here's the skinny: I will post the first comment. In said comment, there will be anywhere from three to seven letters. You (yes, you... and her... yes, and him too) will use the letters to make words, preferably in a witty sort of way :P. After which you will pick out three to seven letters of your own for the next person and so on and so forth. Play as many times as you like. (You know you aren't going to be working anyway... sure, you say you are working but we all know you are really blog-hopping.) What's an acronym you ask? Oh, please, let me explain :) acronym n : A word formed from the initial letters of a name example: JDLP could be 'Jessica doesn't like puppies." (hardly hilarious, but an acronym nonetheless) So, get it? Good, then go play! Other things you should know: 1. If you screw up, just delete it and I will come on and permanently delete it when I have a chance. 2. If you forget to add letters, I will give you like five minutes and then add them for you (as long as I am online) 3. If there is a double post, just go with the newest set of letters or both sets if you kick that much ass ;) 4. And per request, word verification is off for TODAY ONLY :) 5. Say whatever you like. You feel like cussing? Then fucking cuss! Thought of a really dirty/risqué phrase? Post it! Feel like poking fun at my lack of a sex life? Hey, you may as well, everyone else is :P It's an acronym free for all. And lastly, for those of you who can't wait until next Wednesday to play again, CowGirl was kind enough to point out that uproar.com has picked up my beloved Acrophobia. You can register for free, I know this because I have. Keep an eye out for me, I'm there... Just not today. Today, I am playing here ;) And you had better be too! :P
Happy Acroing!
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 6:55 AM
| link to this post | 18 spoke |

Tuesday, November 15, 2005
uh - yeah, so I suck
So, judging from the fifteen or so emails I have gotten (a few of which were from readers who haven't ever emailed me before), I take it some of you are worried about me? lol
Ok, ok, ok, I suck. Between actually being busy as fuck at work and at home, I have also been a little down, off and on, for the last week or so.
The impending doom of the holidays? Possibly.
I have never been very good at juggling my emotions. I'd rather just pick one emotion and stick with it. If I am gonna be pissy, then I will give it my all. If I am happy, then I am fucking jazzed. Right now, I am a little stuck in the middle of a pond of combined emotions.
On the one hand, my sister is FINALLY coming home. She will be here Friday and she is staying until the end of next Summer. I have missed her so much, just her company alone helps keep me sane. On the other hand, this time last year, I was preparing for my trip to the coast with Veronique, where we spent Thanksgiving with Tempest. It was the last trip Veronique and I took together and it is making it very hard for me to get happy about Thanksgiving this year. Not to mention that it is shining a huge spot light on the fact that this is the first Thanksgiving since she's been gone. Her birthday is December 14th... this would have been her twenty first birthday, we had plans. Last year, when she came home for Thanksgiving and Christmas, she and I spent so much time together. Every minute that we weren't working, we were together. She was here on New Year's Eve and we drank wine and watched Steel Magnolias and set off baby fireworks outside for the girls. She should be here now and I am having a hard time coping with how much I miss her. On a good note, her mom is coming for a visit. She will be here tomorrow and she is staying for a week. I won't get to see her the whole week because she is trying to squeeze in as much time as she can with everyone that she knows here, but on Monday she and I are taking the girls to a movie and out to dinner. I have missed her a bunch and I am counting down the days until Monday. Amanda's birthday is this Saturday. She will be nine! And I have to work so, I won't even be home. The working thing is totally fair since I never work Saturdays and Jiffinner will be out of town and Boss has to have the day off. It's just part of pulling my own weight, but Amanda was bummed that I wouldn't be home and that any plans we may have had now have to be postponed. Plus, my daughter is turning nine. Nine. And I have been feeling like I am getting sick for the last four or five days. I hate being sick.
That is just the tip of my emotional iceberg. There is so much going on right now with work, with family, with friends and a lot of it is good but some of it is sad and I feel like that guy at the circus that is twirling plates. If I stop twirling them, then they are going to come crashing down around me. And I just don't feel like picking up all those pieces right now. The word "overwhelmed" was created for weeks like these.
So, don't fret about me. I am ok. I am just very 'BLAH'...
I swear, in the next couple of days, everything will be back to normal here :)
Thanks for the emails and the concern, it means more than you know.
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 7:47 AM
| link to this post | 3 spoke |

Thursday, November 10, 2005
my (almost forgotten) HNT

OMG! IS it? Could it actually be? Did Kate manage a cleavage shot?
Trust me, if you knew me, you would say those aren't mine :P
HAPPY HNT!

HNTbutton

so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 4:59 AM
| link to this post | 18 spoke |

Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Lets get ready to ACRO!
Ok, shut it. I am running out of title ideas :P
Below you will find the basic guidelines for Acrophobic Hump Day (lol, that is the one most of you are using on your sites so I am rolling with it). Most of you know how to play as you have been here for... wow, four weeks. This is the fourth week we have had Acrophobia here on LOC (I must be tired because I soooo wanted to type "you down with LOC? yeah you know me!")... You know, on Acrophobia, each set of letters comes with a theme... what do ya'll think about themes? Maybe we should give it a shot for today and see how that goes.. If you don't like it, email me. That's what the flying thing on the sidebar is for ;)

So here's the skinny: I will post the first comment. In said comment, there will be anywhere from three to seven letters. You (yes, you... and her... yes, and him too) will use the letters to make words, preferably in a witty sort of way :P. After which you will pick out three to seven letters of your own for the next person and so on and so forth. Play as many times as you like. (You know you aren't going to be working anyway... sure, you say you are working but we all know you are really blog-hopping.)
What's an acronym you ask? Oh, please, let me explain :)
acronym n : A word formed from the initial letters of a name example: JDLP could be 'Jessica doesn't like puppies." (hardly hilarious, but an acronym nonetheless)
So, get it?
Good, then go play!

Other things you should know:
1. If you screw up, just delete it and I will come on and permanently delete it when I have a chance.
2. If you forget to add letters, I will give you like five minutes and then add them for you (as long as I am online)
3. If there is a double post, just go with the newest set of letters or both sets if you kick that much ass ;)
4. And per request, word verification is off for TODAY ONLY :)
5. Say whatever you like. You feel like cussing? Then fucking cuss! Thought of a really dirty/risqué phrase? Post it! Feel like poking fun at my lack of a sex life? Hey, you may as well, everyone else is :P It's an acronym free for all.
And lastly, for those of you who can't wait until next Wednesday to play again,
CowGirl was kind enough to point out that uproar.com has picked up my beloved Acrophobia. You can register for free, I know this because I have. Keep an eye out for me, I'm there... Just not today. Today, I am playing here ;) And you had better be too! :P
Happy Acroing!
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 12:01 AM
| link to this post | 35 spoke |

Sunday, November 06, 2005
this is what kind of chic I am
Today, Amanda and I decided to fry up some chicken nuggets. We had chicken in the freezer and honestly, frying is one of the few cooking-type things I can pull off with out a huge mess and seriously fucking up some stuff (and by stuff I mean the food itself, the stove, the pots/pans it was cooked in, and if it gets that far, the people who eat it).
I had an ulterior motive for this since there was a package of about a dozen shrimp in the freezer as well. I figured if I offered to fry some chicken, I could fry the shrimp up for me. You know, since kids can't eat shrimp since they are on the "Yucky" list. Which, by the way, is fine with me since I don't like to share my shrimp. I digress...
Anyway, I fried the shrimp and the chicken and then decided that maybe I should make something to go with them. I think that is how you end up with a "meal"... by adding a couple of side dishes... or so I've been told :P

So, I check my cabinets and see that I have some sour cream and chive mashed potatoes (and yes, I make mashed potatoes from the box. Why? Two reasons: 1. It's easier. 2. If I buy real potatoes, I will never use them before they start growing stuff.. lots of stuff and I think after the amount of stuff that has grown on the potato is bigger than the potato itself, you have to throw it out. At least, that is my rule...) and a few boxes of macaroni and cheese. We always have macaroni and cheese. Always.
So, I throw all the ingredients for the mashed potatoes into a bowl and stick them into my best friend: the microwave and throw some water on the stove for the mac and cheese. Then, I start to clean up the kitchen. I am all proud of myself seeing as how I had almost finished cooking an entire meal and my kitchen was practically clean. I was adding up my Mommy Points while checking to make sure that the macaroni noodles were fully cooked. When they had passed that 'chewy' stage and entered the 'edible' stage, I drained the water and had Amanda grab the milk and butter from the fridge. While she did that, I opened the little packet of dried cheese and poured it onto the noodles. And something was wrong. Very wrong. The powdered cheese was the wrong color. Let me say that again, the powdered cheese was the wrong color. Who am I that I know this? I know what color powdered cheese is supposed to be. I KNOW WHAT COLOR POWDERED CHEESE IS SUPPOSED TO BE. Yeah. And it was so the wrong color.
So, I went over to the trash can and grabbed the box that Kraft's finest had come in to check for an expiration date. AN expiration date. On macaroni and cheese. It was the only thing I could think of to do under these circumstances. I mean, it had never happened before. The powdered cheese is always that too orange color. But not this time... this time it was some weird brownish tinted color. I was scared. And apparently, rightfully so: February 12, 2005. What the fuck? You mean, mac and cheese actually goes bad? Since when? Since when have you not been able to keep mac and cheese in the cabinet FOREVER and have it still be fine??? The cheese is powder. How does powder go bad? How?
As I am standing there looking at the expiration date on the blue box and the brownish tinted powdered cheese on my noodles, my faith in prepackaged food wavered. It has never wavered. Anything that I can cook in the microwave or oven or if I absolutely have to, on the stove that came from the cabinet or freezer is MY FRIEND. How can mac and cheese not be my friend any more? Isn't there a law that states boxed food has to be good for the lifetime of the person who purchased it? Isn't there?
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 11:05 PM
| link to this post | 7 spoke |

Friday, November 04, 2005
I was like such a goddess!
You ever have one of those days that just gets better the further along it gets?
Two things happened yesterday that just made my day.

The first of which was on my drive home where I got honked at, not once, but twice! And not the honking I would normally cause (the get-the-fuck-out-of-the-way honking or the you're-going-the-wrong-way-on-a-one-way-road-lady honking or the... heh heh... well, you get the idea). This was good honking! The kind where the guy thought I looked cute and honked at me. Two guys. Oh hell yeah. Nothing will boost your ego a little like being honked at.

The second was much cooler. I discovered another loop hole in life. Namely in my mothering life. While shopping, I picked up some Pita bread that was on sale and then thought it would be fun to let the girls make little pizzas from it. So, I got some mozzarella cheese and pepperoni and olives and parmesan and pizza sauce. This ended up being beyond brilliant. The girls stuffed their (whole wheat) pita bread with sauce, cheese and pepperoni and fucking loved it. We stuck them in the microwave for like 45 seconds and it was ready. Dinner was quick, easy and with almost no mess. Oh hell yeah. And the best part is that they want to do it again. Tonight! lol
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 8:20 AM
| link to this post | 5 spoke |

Thursday, November 03, 2005
First November HNT

HNT

I don't have any stories for this week's HNT. In fact, this pic was taken a few weeks ago for another HNT, but didn't make the cut. Anyway, I am saving all of my story writing for NaNoWriMo! And I have an entirely different blog set up for it. Do you Nano? Email me and I will link you! HAPPY HNT!

HNTbutton

so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 12:11 AM
| link to this post | 27 spoke |

Wednesday, November 02, 2005
Again with the acro-ing!
Let's review:
So here's the skinny: I will post the first comment. In said comment, there will be anywhere from three to seven letters. You (yes, you... and her... yes, and him too) will use the letters to make words, preferably in a witty sort of way :P. After which you will pick out three to seven letters of your own for the next person and so on and so forth. Play as many times as you like. (You know you aren't going to be working anyway... sure, you say you are working but we all know you are really blog hopping.)
What's an acronym you ask? Oh, please, let me explain :) acronym n : A word formed from the initial letters of a name example: JDLP could be 'Jessica doesn't like puppies." (hardly hilarious, but an acronym nonetheless)
So, get it? Good, then go play!
Shortly into the game, we ran into some other things worthy of addressing:
1. If you screw up, just delete it and I will come on and permanently delete it when I have a chance.
2. If you forget to add letters, I will give you like five minutes and then add them for you (as long as I am online)
3. If there is a double post, just go with the newest set of letters or both sets if you kick that much ass ;)
4. And per request, word verification is off for TODAY ONLY :)5. Say whatever you like. You feel like cussing? Then fucking cuss! Thought of a really dirty/risqué phrase? Post it! Feel like poking fun at my lack of a sex life? Hey, you may as well, everyone else is :P It's an acronym free for all.
By the way, for those of you who can't wait until next Wednesday to play again,
CowGirl was kind enough to point out that uproar.com has picked up my beloved Acrophobia. You can register for free, I know this because I have. Keep an eye out for me, I'm there... Just not today. Today, I am playing here ;) And you had better be too! :P
Happy Acroing!
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 6:16 AM
| link to this post | 21 spoke |

Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Wanna see some pics?
So, trick or treating ROCKED! I was a little concerned that Trin would get all whiny and tired and I would have to carry her or leave early... nope. Trin is a trooper. She LED the trick or treating line for the first couple of miles! She loved it. She said "trick or treat" and "thank you" every time. It was a blast :)

Pictures are here.
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 6:11 AM
| link to this post | 3 spoke |


Who: katehopeeden
Where: San Antonio, Texas Yeah, so I am all that you see here. I am friendly and kind, crazy and bitchy, playful and flirty... sometimes I am funny but mostly I just write the first thing that comes to mind and then stop when it ends. I love life and I am lucky to be living the one that I am. Want to know more?
Click here!




12/14/84 - 1/26/05


"The most wasted day is one in which we have not laughed"

"Life moves pretty fast, if you don’t stop and look around once in a while you might miss it."

"Guys are like stars, there's a million of them out there but only one of them can make your dreams come true." "Don't spend your life with someone you can live with, spend it with someone you can't live without."

"Reach for the moon, even if you miss you will still land among the stars"



Veronique

Yoda

Hot Toddy

Finding Liz

The Adorable DB

Tux Baby
Malcolm (he'll be back)

They'll All Fall

we grabbed the lion

Red Hot Sexy Papa

Snow

dooce

Madi (my stalker)

Did I miss you?
Do you feel left out and sad?
Click that link up there
and email me your blog!

Childhood Memories

My Mother

The Story of AZ

The Time In Between

The Beginning Of NY

The man from my dreams

The End Of NY

Growing and Changing

Learning to Cope

These are a work in progress. They are in the right order, but more will fill in the blank spaces in time as I write them.

"I just got done reading the history lessons on your blog (yes, I've been lurking on your blog). All the respect I had for you...has increased, like, tenfold. I don't think I could have done it. To go through what you have and not only still be able to discuss it with such wit and poise, but also to raise those three gorgeous girls. You are truly an inspiration. You are honestly one of the strongest people I have ever known, either online or IRL. Thank you so much." -Stef

www.flickr.com
katehopeeden's photos More of katehopeeden's photos

That cracked my shit up! TM

Kate went to Dallas?

You asked Kate questions?

Kate was stung by a Scorpion?

Kate met Mr. I?

Kate got pissed?

There was a mouse?

Kate shared?

Kate confessed?

Kate turned 25?

Kate shared some more?

"There are some of us out here who are living vicariously through you, okay?! So for god's sake, let us have some fun and excitement!" -Educated Liberal

"I LOVE inner monologues. They rock!"
-Hot Toddy


Ebay

The Gym

Morning Monologue

RHBlogger 2nd runner

sizzling RH 05







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