It's such a weird thing to be afraid of. I get it when you are talking about a LIZARD IN MY HAIR or something equally unsettling... but my boss won't go out onto our back porch if there is a lizard there and about once or twice a month, there is.
Two days ago he and I were headed out the back door to go look at one of the houses and one second we were walking along and the next second he is jumping backwards.
It should be noted that we were still eight feet from the glass door leading outside.
I turned to look at him and he pointed at the door.
And there it was, a lizard on the porch.
I rolled my eyes knowing two things-
One: I am not afraid of lizards that are smaller than my arm.
Two: Lizards RUN AWAY AS FAST AS HUMANLY LIZARDLY POSSIBLE when confronted with a human being. I know this because as a child, it is damn near impossible to catch one.
I rolled my eyes at him as I continued to walk and he stood cemented in place.

The next night, Amanda and I were lounging on the couch talking about nonsense, watching the TV and getting the giggles when something reminded me of that story and I told it to her through fits of laughter. You know when you get those ridiculous giggles that you can't stop and you are crying for no reason? That was the kind of laughing we were doing that night.
So anyway, at the end of it, I blurt out, "AND THEN HE SAID HE WAS GOING TO GO AND THROW A ROCK AT IT!!' HAHAHAHAHAHA!
We calm down and Amanda looks over at me and says, "That would be like throwing a rock at a lion."
I try to understand the comparison and fail to and say, "Uh, yeah suuure Amanda. It's exactly like that."
She bursts into giggles again and says, "I mean, if lizards were scary at all."
It made no sense and was hilarious simultaneously.
And I want to remember that five years from now. That on the cusp of being thirteen, my daughter and I could lay on the couch and laugh about nothing until we cried.

Labels: Amanda, At work, Being Mommy