Monday, July 14, 2008
A whole new world...
I went out to dinner on Friday night with the Bachelor and a new guy, we'll call him Martial Arts Man. That's very super-hero-esque isn't it? Well it wasn't my intention to be having dinner with two absolutely random men but since some of you (-ahem- you know who you are) bailed on my, I was left no other choice. It was that or ditch them both and that's just not in my bag of tricks. So I sucked it up and with a very que sera, sera attitude, I went to dinner. Was I freaking out a little about the potential awkwardness? Well yeah but if an awkward dinner is the worst thing I have going on these days, I must be doing pretty good.
So I get to TGI Fridays and meet the Bachelor who is honestly not looking so great, I'm worries about him. We order drinks and I inform him of how my group dinner plans have somehow went awry and now it is just him and me and Martial Arts Man. He laughs and tells me to quit freaking out and then our final guest arrives.
Dinner was weird. The Bachelor and I have been friends for a long time and have no problem killing a few hours and both of us are fairly personable people so we don't usually have a hard time with new people but the conversation was just off. It was a struggle. And here's the thing, Martial Arts Man is a little weird. I hadn't really hung out with him before and just knew him through work (he is the son of a co-worker) and we'd emailed a little back and forth some and he seemed nice enough. I invited him out with us because I thought it would be a good way to get to know him a little better without implying anything.
It's this new thing I am apparently doing called: pre-dating.
I can't even date, people. I am pre-dating.
And thank goodness because had I went on actual date with this guy I would have had to tell him afterwards that I wasn't interested (despite the muscles and dimples) and that would have sucked for both of us. Now I don't have to do that, I can just continue being friendly with the guy and there isn't any weird break-up type conversation. Do people even break up after one date? I love pre-dating.

I met another guy on Sunday at a bbq who was single (recently divorced) and he seemed like he was pretty cool but as the day wore on he was just radiating desperation. Guys who are very recently divorced seem to do that. They are either desperately wanting to fix their marriages or desperately wanting to find another marriage. And when they meet someone like yours truly who is single & has her shit together you can almost see it in their eyes. Like in those old time cartoons when the pupils of their eyes turn into hearts. And not to sound all shitty but I am not into dating the desperate guy.
SnowElf and I had a talk about this last week. Well actually we talk about this kind of stuff pretty much every week. We were talking about how much our ideas about the kind of guys we want to date has changed as we've gotten older and how I kind of feel like a snob sometimes because I have these preset criteria in my head and I just don't seem very willing to budge much. And I don't mean like the dude snores or doesn't have all of his hair or drives a Chevy and so now I can't date him. I just mean that there are traits I want in another person and seeing as how I've been single now for like freakin' six years, waiting for the right guy isn't such a huge deal any more. I don't want to date so I am dating or so I am not alone. I want to date to find someone who is right and if I have look for a long time to find that person, I'm ok with that because I am ok with being single.
There you go, a little therapeutic breakthrough. How much do I owe ya'll?

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so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 9:02 AM
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Who: katehopeeden
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