Wednesday, July 27, 2005
too soon
Ok, I am not sure how PC this topic is but since this is my blog and it is my issue, damn it, here is where I will talk about it.
My oldest daughter and I were driving to gymnastics a few weeks ago when she looked over at me and said, "I can't wait until I am eleven." I thought eleven? I mean, ten I get - it's double digits, thirteen I get - it's teenaged... but eleven? So, I asked her to elaborate. And she tells me that when she is eleven, she will have boobs.
I laughed a little and told her that she would probably not have boobs until she was thirteen or fourteen (or twenty one if the deal with the devil and my soul goes through). She disagreed stating that she thinks she is already getting boobs. I told her that she would know because it hurts when you get them.
Then I started paying attention and noticed that she is right. Oh. God. No. I don't know how graphic is too graphic here... but my daughter is eight (she will be nine in November) and she shouldn't have anything even slightly resembling breasts for many years (in my humble opinion, which apparently means jack shit). However, she is... softening up - for lack of a better term. I had noticed that she is putting on a little weight and when I say little, I mean, literally, a little. Usually when this happens, I can expect a growth spurt. She is healthy and active and normal and all those great kid things. But, the changes in her chest area, not from the weight. I can see where things are changing.
I am staring at my daughter's chest. All the time. I don't mean to, but she will be talking to me and I am trying to see if anything has changed. And god damnit, nothing should be anything because. she. is. eight!
Let me say this clearly - I AM NOT READY FOR PUBERTY in any way shape or form. Fuck, I am just getting the hang of the 'kid' thing. I don't want to be another centimeter closer to puberty and Teenager Land and all the hell that accompanies it. You see, I was, very recently, a teenager and they are evil, evil beings who cause their parents all kinds of grief and I am just not ready for that particular level of hell just yet, thankyouverymuch.
What to do... What to do... Since I can't physically stop this (pending soul deal, remember?), I guess I am going to have to take another step up that parenting ladder. Learn the tricks of the trade for dealing with a slightly prepubescent adolescent (sorry, couldn't help it, it rhymed too well) and master them. I just hope I don't fuck Amanda up too bad since she really is my guinea pig in this whole thing. I learn what to do and what not to do from practicing on her. I can see her in therapy now...
"It was horrible, my mom was trying to shove my boobs back into my chest screaming "NOOOOO! You are too young!!!" Then they took her off to the asylum, she has been there ever since..."
Boobs! For fuck's sake. I just hope that they grow REALLY slowly.
~K
so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 12:00 AM
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