Lots of craziness: The Date

Sunday, December 11, 2005

The Date

So, I was not as nervous as I thought I would be. I kept very busy all day cleaning my kitchen and then rearranging my daughters room. By the time I was done in the girls room and had started dinner, I should have already been in the shower getting ready. So, I jumped in and got myself cleaned up. Now you chics know that the pre date shower and regular showers are different, so I was in there for like three times the amount of time I usually am. My sister did my hair since she has an innate ability to make it curlier than it already is and then I called The Cake Lady to see if she was feeling better and was going to be able to go. Not only was she feeling better but she was ready to go. It occurred to me that I might want to move my ass. So, make-up and clothes (for those of you wondering what I was wearing: black skirt that came to my knees, black hose, black 3/4 sleeve shirt, black heels) and I was ready to go.
My mother, who was here to watch the girls had brought me a black jacket and before you start saying "awwww" the thing was like circa 1982. I am talking shoulder pads and jumbo buttons. Needless to say I passed and opted for a blue jean jacket that was NOT warm, but looked nice. I loaded up my purse and headed over to TCL's house (since that's where we were all meeting). Truth be told, I was hoping to get there before Snakeman and have a chance to run how I looked by TCL and adjust anything accordingly. No such luck. When I pulled into the driveway, his truck was already there. So, I grabbed my purse and headed to the door.
Well, any lingering hope I had of being able to speak to TCL for .3 seconds was gone when TCL's husband (who needs a name!!) and Snakeman opened the door. He scanned me.
(I've covered my definition of "scanning" here haven't I? Ok, the origination of the reference of "scanning" came from one of the salesmen that I work with. We started calling him The Body Scan Man because whenever he was in any room with any one of us chics (that work in my office) he scans you. He looks you all the way up, slowly, and then all the way back down. He's one of those guys who barely ever makes eye contact because he is never looking at your face. In his case, the scanning is creepy and makes you wish you had a parka on, but the word itself has come to encompass any and all men that look you all the way down and then up again.)
So, he scanned me. He started at the bottom and worked his way up and then went back down again. This was followed by "wow, you're dressed up. Are you going somewhere?" TCL then did one of the millions of things that makes her my friend and said she loved my shoes. I couldn't help myself, in front of the guys and everything I was a total chic and stuck my foot out so she could get a better look and told her I loved them too. Then, my self conscious slapped me and screamed "UHG! KATE, this is a DATE remember??" and I vowed to act as such for the remainder of the evening. I'll let you be the judge of how that worked out.
So, TCL and her husband took their three kids next door and left he and I alone. Totally not awkward, thank goodness.
Do you remember the bottle caps from that first night? Well, I had brought them all home with me and showed them to my mother (who is a bartender) and when she got here, she handed me a bag of them. So total now, I have around twenty. I put all of them into a ziplock bag and took them with me. While he and I were sitting there waiting for TCL to get back, we started going through the bag of caps.
When she did get back, we somehow all ended up standing up. I don't know how, probably because none of us were sure if we should go yet (it was a little early) or hang out for a few more minutes. The guys decided to get some beer they had outside and bring it in before we left and this was the first time he touched me. Totally caught me off guard. When he walked by me he did that thing tickle thing. You know, when you walk up behind someone and like tickle touch them on the back. I hope that makes sense because I have no idea how else to describe it. Anyway we walked past each other in the kitchen when he was going out side and when he walked by he did that thing on my stomach.
We left about fifteen minutes later. We had decided ahead of time that since there was an open bar, only one of us should drive. And since TCL doesn't drink very much or sometimes at all, we took their car. And by "car" I mean "tiny sports coupe". So, Snakeman and I are in the tiniest back seat I have ever seen. Ever. The drive there (about twenty minutes) was reminiscent of TCL's husband and Snakeman's antics when they were younger.
When we got there, we headed inside and were lucky to be among the first people to show up. This is where I screwed up for the second time. See, I know all of these people and I have met all of their significant others at several other parties AND I am not used to having a date, so I frequently forgot to introduce Snakeman. It was probably only the first fifteen minutes or so before I started to remember. He stood up everytime he shook someone's hand. Every time. Points for him :)
We got our first round of drinks. The guys, Shinerbocks, TCL and I, merlot. If you have known me for more than two minutes, you know I love merlot. The initial cup was v-e-r-y small. And the line for the bar stayed very long so it was looking very unlikely that I was going to be able to drink the amount of merlot that I wanted to. However, when Snakeman went to get the next round, he came back with a MUCH larger glass for both TCL and myself. And she said she was pretty much done, so two very big glasses for me. There would be at least one more big and another small... maybe two. I lost count.
Why is she talking about drinks? I would just like for the record to show that I had at least one entire bottle of merlot in my system when you guys are saying "what? Did she seriously do that?" later.
By the time I had killed one big cup of wine, I had a nice buzz and the place was packed. The tables were all filling up, ours included (each table sat like 20 people). I have talked about a guy that I work with several times. He was previously running our rental dept and I think I may have used his real name but since I frequently reference him and I don't want to use his real name, we will be calling him The Bachelor from now on. Anyway, he and I are very good, very platonic friends and I value not only his friendship but also his opinion. He sat by Snakeman and the two of them brought each other drinks which was cool. I'll have to remember to post his text messages that came later.
Ok, so this is getting really long. A couple more highlights and lets get out of the party.
*I am a people watcher. I will sit in restaurants and stare at people. It's awful but I think it is the writer in me. Many guys that I have dated have been bothered by my inability to concentrate on them when in public because I am too busy watching everyone. This is clearly not going to be a problem with Snakeman. He practically delighted in being told who was who and little bits of dirt. He actually noticed people and grabbed names from name tags and then would tell me how he thought they were and he was dead on. And whenever he would lean in to tell me something, his head was always touching mine.
*The daughter of the owner of Fantasy Disco Ford, whom I adore, pulled me aside later in the night to (A) tell me she loved my shoes and wished she could still wear shoes like that at her age (early fifties maybe) and to tell me my date was and I quote "darling". And that he was also very brave to attend a company party. Which is also what The Bachelor said.
*As the night progressed, inhibited I was not. I am a touchy feely person anyway but throw some alcohol into the mix and well, I am still a touchy feely person. There was arm touching, there was leg touching, I had my hand on the back of his chair and there was back touching.
All in all, he did the Christmas party very well. He was charming, intelligent, friendly... you name it. I was impressed.
I have no idea what time it was when we decided to leave. Probably because of how much I had drank. Ok, not probably. Because of how much I had drank. Which was a lot. I remember that it was fucking cold. Like my teeth were chatting with in seconds and I had left my jacket in the car. By the time we got into the car, I was freezing. When he got in the car, I was all about sucking away his warmth. He had his arm around me and I was buried in his chest. Once I was warm and sat back up he held my hand. To be honest, the majority of the ride home I was trying to figure out how to kiss him. Again, alcohol. I mean, I have kissed guys first before while stone cold sober, but I am more likely to when I have been drinking. So, we were probably half way home before I did it. Now, where I was looking to be like kissed, kissed, he was slower than that. I mean, I can see the first kiss being the peck kiss, but the second usually involves some kind of open mouth. I had handed everyone gum when we left the party so that everyone's breath would be lovely. The second kiss was the same as the first and it was about five minutes before we got home. Nice, don't get me wrong.
When we got to their place (he had his hand on my back on the way from the car to the door... he probably thought I was going to fall over. No, seriously I am good at being composed and walking straight and all that jazz.) and went inside we all sat down and chatted about god knows what until midnight and then Snakeman and I excused ourselves. Back out into the freezing cold.
He thanked me for the invite and I thanked him for having not only survived but kicked ass at the whole thing. I was shaking it was so cold and I had my jacket on. He hugged me. It was a long hug, I thought it might be because of TCL and husband in the front seat, but the goodbye kisses, which thank goodness he initiated, were the same. Through out the hug, which was a good five minutes we talked and then a final kiss and I left.
Ok, I think I covered everything. It was absolutely great. The whole night was great :) I don't think I left anything out, but ask if you think of something. I will be posting some pics on my flickr account. I will see if I can get one of him up there...

so eloquently put by katehopeeden at 8:48 AM
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Who: katehopeeden
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