Really this blog is just a cover so that I can sporadically profess my love for Matthew (as Jiffinner put it yesterday) "McConauHOTTY!"
But it's that time again, he is single.
And despite what you may have read last year, I am not in the habit of breaking up relationships (shut.it) so I have been waiting, patiently, while he got tired of Penny and all her exoticness.
Those of you who are long time readers have had the pleasure of reading about my obsession on several occasions (shit, I ran out of words to link... also here, here, here, here, oooooh and here, here, and here) and a few of you frequently email me articles or pictures or gossip about him. Three days ago I got four emails telling me that Matthew and Penelope had split. FOUR. And that was nothing compared to the onslaught of emails I got when he was named People's Sexiest Man Alive.
I do secretly hope that one day someone he knows will email him a link to my blog and he will then fall madly in love with my through my writing and come to San Antonio (which is really a short drive Matthew McConaughey!) and stalk me.
Oh to be stalked by Matthew McConaughey.
*sigh*
He would have to get used to me calling him that all the time. I don't think I could refer to him as a Matt or even a Matthew... nope, I would have to use his full name all the time.
'Hey, Matthew McConaughey, come back to bed.'
'Yeah, I am dating Matthew McConaughey.'
'Oh, Matthew McConaughey, of course I will marry you!'
'Matthew McConaughey, you have to remember to put the seat on the toilet down.'
Ok, that one is a little less likely. Because, seriously, if you had this in your bed when you came home, would you really care if the seat was down?
It is really the definition of torture knowing that he lives just like an hour and a half away. He's right there, in Austin. Combine that with the fact that one of the guys I work with knows him and refuses to hogtie him and bring him to my office so I can play with him and it's just. not. fair.
So, if you happen to be a friend of Matthew McConaughey's and you are reading this, email him this link and then give him a call and tell him that he is wasting his time with the Penelope's of the world when the chic he is meant to be with is right around the corner.
